Love Like Winter

It kicked off with fries and C2. It was the usual conversation while killing time. Consuming every bite, joking around and making fun of ourselves. When out of nowhere she uttered, "Mas magiging masaya naman ako kung gugustuhin ko lang..." (I cant remember the exact words but something like that.) I stare at her. Saw sadness in her eyes. I replied to her saying, "Thats the beauty of it, there are so many people offering you for a pair of shoe but you choose to wear slippers..." Knowing her, without her opinion, im pretty sure that she would rather walk with a slipper on a very rocky road than to wear a very comPublish Postfortable pair of shoes offered by others. She replied, "Siguro mas komportable lang ako sa tsinelas..." then she smiled.

Days, months and a year have passed but i haven't seen any changes. Still, same old face. Still looking at an old portrait of depression and frustrations.

I can still remember, it was on the first week of the month before the early mass takes place on every churches. She was so happy about a coming special day. I noticed that she's really looking forward to solemnize that day. I pulled a joke to her saying "Talaga?! One year na? Congrats ha! Pangarap natin 'to!" while extending my hands for a hand shake while laughing out loud. She gaved way for that day, set asiding every meetings, appointments and things that she should do on that day. The "Special Day" went well according to her. She was so delighted with what happened that day. But something happened while she's trying to call him. A simple mistake. (Sorry but i cant give out the real deal on the story... hehe) Anyway, Old relationship issues arise. That happiness that she felt didn’t last. It was altered by misery. Many thoughts runs on her mind, in fact it is killing her. Confusion, frustration and depression and even death.

Almost two weeks after that incident, i know she's quite OK now (i guess). Unlike before. Too fragile and too weak. A single memory that might remind her of him, she'll break down and moistened her eyes.

I suddenly remember what a friend told me, "Bakit mo pa kailangan ng orig na chuck taylor kung pwede naman ang fake?". (A metaphor for the quote "Why settle for more if you can settle for less".) The phrase was out of the topic of our conversation but i still throw it out to shift gears to another topic.

If you'll just imagine on how this girl cope up with her burdens. What im tryin gto say here is love can be compassionate and cruel. It can never be complete without the trials and heartaches, it comes and it go. It has its own season. Im not saying that what she's doin' right now is totally wrong, everyone of us has different perception and approaches with our griefs. In fact, I completely understand her. You might end up empty handed, but at least you go for the one who makes all the pain worth it. Many us believe thatlove should make uyou happy, and we know that happiness rest on his heart. Go, fall... You just love and love, no matter how stupid you may become. Sometimes you just have to forget the rules, follow your heart and see where it takes you. There should be no room for regrets. Do what you think is right...

"There are two infinite things in life: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe... That's why i called this love like winter..."

-ben michael